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Under Hayward s influence he had persuaded himself that the festivities that attend this season were vulgar and barbaric, and he made up his mind that he would take no notice of the day but when it came, the jollity of all around affected him strangely. His landlady and her husband were spending the day with a married daughter, and to save trouble Philip announced that he would take his meals out. He went up to London towards mid day and ate a slice of turkey and some Christmas pudding by himself at Gatti s, and since he had nothing to do afterwards went to Westminster Abbey for the afternoon service. The streets were almost empty, and the people who went along had a preoccupied look they did not saunter but walked with some definite goal in view, and hardly anyone was alone. To Philip they all seemed happy. He felt himself more solitary than he had ever done in his life. His intention had been to kill the day somehow in the streets and then dine at a restaurant, but he could not face again the sight of cheerful people, talking, laughing, and making merry so he went back to Waterloo, and on his way through the Westminster Bridge Road bought some ham and a couple of mince pies and went back to Barnes. He ate his food in his lonely little room and spent the evening with a book. His depression was almost intolerable. When he was back at the office it made him very sore to listen to Watson s account of the short holiday. They had had some jolly girls staying with them, and after dinner they had.oked away again. I was going to ask you to marry me, he said. I thought p raps you might, but I shouldn t have liked to stand in your way. inter milan training gear You wouldn t have done that. How about your travels, Spain and all that How d you know I want to travel I ought to know something about it. I ve heard you and Dad talk about it till you were blue in the face. I don t care a damn about all that. He paused for an instant and then spoke in a low, hoarse whisper. I don t want to leave you I can t leave you. She did not answer. He could not tell what she thought. I wonder if you ll marry me, Sally. She did not move and there was no flicker of emotion on her face, but she did not look at him when she answered. If you like. Don t you want to Oh, of course I d like to have a house of my own, and it s about time I was settling down. He smiled a little. He knew her pretty well by now, and her manner did not surprise him. But don t you want to marry ME There s no one else I would marry. Then that settles it. Mother and Dad will be surprised, won t they I m so happy. I want my lunch, she said. Dear He smiled and took her hand and pressed it. They got up and walked out of the gallery. They stood for a moment at the balustrade and looked at Trafalgar Square. Cabs and omnibuses hurried to and fro, and crowds passed, hastening in every direction, and the sun was shininganager had a sardonic way of dealing with such applicants. Think you re worth more, do you How much d you think you re worth, eh The assistant, with his heart in his mouth, would suggest that he thought he ought to have another two shillings a week. Oh, very well, if you think you re worth it. You can ave it. Then he paused and sometimes, with inter milan training gear a steely eye, added And you can ave your notice too. It was no use then to withdraw your request, you had to go. The manager s idea was that assistants who were dissatisfied did not work properly, and if they were not worth a rise it was better to sack them at once. The result was that they never asked for one unless they were prepared to leave. Philip hesitated. He was a little suspicious of the men in his room who told him that the buyer could not do without him. They were decent fellows, but their sense of humour was primitive, and it would have seemed funny to them if they had persuaded Philip to ask for more wages and he were sacked. He could not forget the mortification he had suffered in looking for work, he did not wish to expose himself to that again, and he knew there was small chance of his getting elsewhere a post as designer there were hundreds of people about who could draw as well as he. But he wanted money very badly his clothes were worn out, and the heavy carpets rotted his socks and boots he had almost persuaded himself to take the venturesome step when one morning, passing up from breakfast in the basement through the passage that led to the manager s office, he saw a queue of men waiting in answer to an advertisement. There were inter milan training gear about a hundred of them, and whichever was engaged would be offered his keep and the same six shillings inter milan training gear a week that Philip had. He saw some of them cast envious glances at him because he had employment. It made him shudder. He dared not risk it. chapter 108 The winter passed. Now and then Philip went to the hospital, slinking in when inter milan training gear it was late and there was little chance of meeting anyone he knew, to see whether there were letters for him. At Easter he received one from his uncle. He was surprised to hear from him, for the Vicar of Blackstable had never written him more than half a dozen letters in his whole life, and they were on business matters. Dear Philip, If you are thinking of taking a holiday soon and care to come down here I shall be pleased to see you. I was very ill with my bronchitis in the winter and Doctor Wigram.
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