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A middle aged woman, stout and business like, came downstairs, gave them the scrutinising glance of her profession, and asked what accommodation they required. Two single rooms, and if you ve got such a thing we d rather like a cot in one of them. I m afraid I haven t got that. I ve got one nice large double room, and I could let you have a cot. I don t think that would do, said Philip. I could give you another room next week. Brighton s very full just now, and people have to take what they can germany uniform 2019 get. If it were only for a few days, Philip, I think we might be able to manage, said Mildred. I think two rooms would be more convenient. Can you recommend any other place where they take boarders I can, but I don t suppose they d have room any more than I have. Perhaps you wouldn t mind giving me the address. The house the stout woman suggested was in the next street, and they walked towards it. Philip could walk quite well, though he had to lean on a stick, and he was rather weak. Mildred carried the baby. They went for a little in silence, and then he saw she was crying. It annoyed him, and he took no notice, but she forced his attention. france track top Lend me a hanky, will you I can t get at mine with baby, she said in a voice strangled with sobs, turning her head away from him. He gave her his handkerchief, but said nothing. She dried her eyes, and as he did not speak, went on. I might be poisonous. Please don t make a scene in the street, he said. It ll look so funny insisting on separate rooms like that. What ll they think of us If they knew the circumstances I imagine they d think us surprisingly moral, said Philip. She gave him a sidelong glance. You re not going to give it away that we re not married she asked quickly. No. Why won t you live with me as if we were married then My dear, I can t explain. I don t want to humiliate you, but I simply can t. I daresay it s very silly and unreasonable, but it s stronger than I am. I loved you so much that now he broke off. After all, there s no accounting for that sort of thing. A fat lot you must have loved me she exclaimed. The boarding house to which they had been directed was kept by a bustling maiden lady, with shrewd eyes and voluble speech. They could have one double room for twenty five shillings a week each, and five shillings extra for the baby, or they could have two single rooms.
ked so much about you to one another. Griffiths was in the best possible humour, for, having at length passed his final examination, he was qualified, and he had just been appointed house surgeon at a hospital in the North of London. He was taking up his duties at the beginning of france track top May and meanwhile was going home for a ho. liday this was his last week in town, and he was determined to get as much enjoyment into it as he could. He began to talk the gay nonsense which Philip admired because he could not copy it. There was nothing much in what he said, but his vivacity gave it point. There flowed from him a force of life which affected everyone who knew him it was almost as sensible as bodily warmth. Mildred was more lively than Philip had ever known her, and he was delighted to see that his little party was a success. She was amusing herself enormously. She laughed louder and louder. She quite forgot the genteel reserve which had become second nature to her. Presently Griffiths said I say, it s dreadfully difficult for me to call you Mrs. Miller. Philip never calls you anything but Mildred. I daresay she won t scratch your eyes out if you call her that too, laughed Philip. Then she must call me Harry. Philip sat silent while they chattered away and thought how good it was to see people happy. Now and then Griffiths teased him a little, kindly, because he was always so serious. I believe he s quite fond of you, Philip, smiled Mildred. He isn t a bad old thing, answered Griffiths, and taking Philip s hand he shook it gaily. It seemed an added charm in Griffiths that he liked Philip. They were all sober people, and the wine they had drunk went to their heads. Griffiths became more talkative and so boisterous that Philip, amused, had to beg him to be quiet. He had a gift for story telling, and his adventures lost nothing of their romance and their laughter in his narration. He played in all of them a gallant, humorous part. Mildred, her eyes shining with excitement, urged him on. He poured out anecdote after anecdote. When the lights began to be turned out she was astonished. My word, the evening has gone quickly. I thought it wasn t more than half past nine. They got up to go and when she said good bye, she added I m coming to have tea at Philip s room tomorrow. You might look in if you can. All right, he smiled. On the way back to Pimlico Mildred talked of nothing but Griffiths. She was taken with his good looks, his well cut clothes, his voice, h.tead of misery. He saw that the boy hated to discuss the matter and he let him go. But Philip thought over all that the headmaster had said, and presently, his mind taken up entirely with the ceremony that was before him, a mystical rapture seized him. His spirit seemed to free itself from the bonds of the flesh and he seemed to be living a new life. He aspired to perfection with all the passion that was in him. He wanted to surrender himself entirely to the service of God, and he made up his mind definitely that he would be ordained. When the great day arrived, his soul deeply moved by all the preparation, by the books he had studied and above all by the overwhelming influence of the head, he could hardly contain himself for fear and joy. One thought had tormented him. He knew that he would have to walk alone through the chancel, and he dreaded showing his limp thus obviously, not only to the whole school, who were attending the service, but also to the strangers, people from the city or parents who had come to see their sons confirmed. But when the time came he felt suddenly that he could accept the humiliation joyfully and as he limped up the chancel, very small and insignificant beneath the lofty vaulting of the Cathedral, he offered consciously his deformity as a sacrifice to the God who loved him. chapter 18 But Philip could not live long in the rarefied air of the hilltops. What had happened to him when first he was seized by the religious emotion happened to him now. Because he felt so keenly the beauty of faith, because the desire for self sacrifice burned man utd away kits in his heart with such a gem like glow, his strength seemed inadequate to his ambition. He was tired out by the violence of his passion. His soul was filled on a sudden with a singular aridity. He began to forget the presence of God which had seemed so surrounding and his religious exercises, still very punctually performed, grew merely formal. At first he blamed himself for this falling premier league third kits 19/20 away, and the fear of hell fire urged him to renewed vehemence but the passion was dead, and gradually other interests distracted his thoughts. Philip had few friends. His habit of reading isolated him it became such a need that after being in company for some time he grew tired and restless he was vain of the wider knowledge he had acquired from the perusal of so many books, his mind was alert, and he had not the skill to hide his contempt for his companions stupiditya subject which Philip, since coming to the hospital, had studied with anxious attention. He had read everything in the library which treated of talipes in its various forms. He made the boy take off his boot and stocking. He was fourteen, with a snub nose, blue eyes, and a freckled face. His father explained that they wanted something done if france track top possible, it was such a hindrance to the kid in earning his living. Philip looked at him curiously. He was a jolly boy, not at all shy, but talkative and with a cheekiness which his father reproved. He was much interested in his foot. It s only for the looks of the thing, you know, he said to Philip. I don t find it no trouble. Be quiet, Ernie, said his father. There s too much gas about you. Philip examined the foot and passed his hand slowly over the shapelessness of it. He could not understand why the boy felt none of the humiliation which always oppressed himself. He wondered why he could not take his deformity with that philosophic indifference. Presently Mr. Jacobs came up to him. The boy was sitting on the edge of a couch, the surgeon and Philip stood on each side of him and france track top in a semi circle, crowding round, were students. With accustomed brilliancy Jacobs gave a graphic little discourse upon the club foot he spoke of its varieties and of the forms which followed upon different anatomical conditions. I suppose you ve got talipes equinus he said, turning suddenly. to Philip. Yes. Philip felt the eyes of france track top his fellow students rest on him, and he cursed himself because he could not help blushing. He felt the sweat start up in the palms of his hands. The surgeon spoke with the fluency due to long practice and with the admirable perspicacity which distinguished him. He was tremendously interested in his profession. But Philip did not listen. He was only wishing that the fellow would get done quickly. Suddenly he realised that Jacobs was addressing him. You don t mind taking off your sock for a moment, Carey Philip felt a shudder pass through him. He had an impulse to tell the surgeon to go to hell, but he had not the courage to make a scene. He feared his brutal ridicule. He forced himself to appear indifferent. Not a bit, he said. He sat down and unlaced his boot. His fingers were trembling and he thought he should never untie the knot. He remembered how they had forced him at school to show his foot, and the misery which had eaten into his soul. He keeps his feet nice and clean, doesn t he said Jacobs.
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