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They arrived at the hospital, and the S. O. C. went in to see if anyone wanted him. Philip walked on. It had been very hot all the day before, and even now in the early morning there was a balminess in the air. The street was very still. Philip boys germany kit did not feel inclined to go to bed. It was the end of his work and he need not hurry. He strolled along, glad of the fresh air and the silence he thought that he would go on to the bridge and look at day break on the river. A policeman at the corner bade him good morning. He knew who Philip was from his bag. Out late tonight, sir, he italian football jersey 2019 said. Philip nodded and passed. He leaned against the parapet and looked towards the morning. At that hour the great city was like a city of the dead. The sky was cloudless, but the stars were dim at the approach of day there was a light mist on the river, and the great buildings on the north side were like palaces in an enchanted island. A group of barges was moored boys germany kit in midstream. It was all of an unearthly violet, troubling somehow and awe inspiring but quickly everything grew pale, and cold, and gray. Then the sun rose, a ray of yellow gold stole across the sky, and the sky was iridescent. Philip could not get out of his eyes the dead girl lying on the bed, wan and white, and the boy who stood at the end of it like a stricken beast. The bareness of the squalid room made the pain of it more poignant. It was cruel that a stupid chance should have cut off her life when she was just entering upon it but in the very moment of saying this to himself, Philip thought of the life which had been in store for her, the bearing of children, the dreary fight with poverty, the youth broken by toil and deprivation into a slatternly middle age he saw the pretty face grow thin and white, the hair grow scanty, the pretty hands, worn down brutally by work, become like the claws of an old animal then, when the man was past his prime, the difficulty of getting jobs, the small wages he had to take and the inevitable, abject penury of the end she might be energetic, thrifty, industrious, it would not have saved her boys germany kit in the end was the workhouse or subsistence on the charity of her children. Who could pity her becau.
t, nourishing a hateful existence on his life s blood it absorbed his existence so intensely that he could take pleasure in nothing else. He had been used to delight in the grace of St. James Park, and often he sat and looked at the branches of a tree silhouetted against the sky, it was like a Japanese print and he found a continual magic in the beautiful Thames with its barges and its wharfs the changing sky of London had filled his soul with pleasant fancies. But now beauty meant nothing to him. He was bored and restless when he was not with Mildred. Sometimes he thought he would console his sorrow by looking at pictures, but he walked through the National Gallery like a sight seer and no picture called up in him a thrill of emotion. He wondered if he could ever care again for all the things he had boys germany kit loved. He had been devoted to reading, but now books were meaningless and he spent his spare hours in the smoking room of the hospital club, turning over innumerable periodicals. This love was a torment, and he resented bitterly the subjugation in which it held him he was a prisoner and he longed for freedom. Sometimes he awoke in the morning and felt nothing his soul leaped, for he thought he was free he loved no longer but in a little while, as he grew wide awake, the pain settled in his heart, and he knew that he was not cured yet. Though he yearned for Mildred so madly he despised her. He thought to himself that there could be no greater torture in the world than at the same time to love and to contemn. Philip, burrowing as was his habit into the state of his feelings, discussing with himself continually his condition, came to the conclusion that he newborn celtic strip could only cure himself of his degrading passion by making Mildred his mistress. 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At last he could bear the agony no longer. After dinner one evening in the little restaurant in Soho, to which now they often went, he spoke to her. I say, did you mean it the other day that you wouldn t marry me if I asked you Yes, why not Because I can t live without you. I want you with me always. I ve tried to get boys germany kit over it and I can t. I never shall now. I want you to marry me. She had read too many novelettes not to know how to take such an offer. I m sure I m very grateful to you, Philip. I m very much flattered at your proposal. Oh, don t talk rot. You will marry me, won t you D you think we should be happy No. But what does that matter The words were wrung out of boys germany kit him almost against his will. They surprised her. Well, you are a funny chap. Why d you want to marry me then The other day you said you couldn t afford it. I think I ve got about fourteen hundred pounds left. Two can live just as cheaply as one. That ll keep us till I m qualified and have got through with my hospital appointments, and then I can get an assistantship. It means you wouldn t be able to earn anything for six years. We should have about four pounds a week to live on till then, shouldn t we Not much more than three. There are all my fees to pay. And what would you get as an assistant Three pounds a week. D you mean inter milan home shirt to say you have to work all that time and spend a small fortune just to earn three pounds a week at the end of it I don t see that I should be any better off than I am now. He was silent for a moment. D you mean to say you won t marry me he asked hoarsely. Does my great love mean nothing to you at all One has to think of oneself in those things, don t one I shouldn t mind marrying, but I don t want to marry if I m going to be no better off than what I am now. I don t see the use of it. If you cared for me you wouldn t think of all that. P raps not. He was silent. 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