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His eyes were large and blue, but the blue was very pale, and they looked rather tired already. He was clean shaven, and his mouth, notwithstanding its thin lips, was well shaped. Fraulein Anna took an interest in physiognomy, and she made Philip notice afterwards how finely shaped was his skull, and how weak was the lower part of his face. The head, she remarked, was the head of a thinker, but the jaw lacked character. Fraulein Anna, foredoomed to a spinster s life, with her high cheek bones and large misshapen nose, laid great stress upon character. While they talked of him he stood a little apart from the others, watching the noisy party with a good humoured but faintly supercilious expression. He was tall and slim. He held himself with a deliberate grace. Weeks, one of the American students, seeing him alone, went up and began to talk to him. 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Did I wake you up I tried to make up the fire without making a row. Why aren t you in bed What s the time About five. I thought I d better sit up with you tonight. I brought an arm chair in as I thought if I put a mattr. ess down I should sleep so soundly that I shouldn t hear you if you wanted anything. I wish you wouldn t be so good to me, groaned Philip. Suppose you catch it Then you shall nurse me, old man, said Griffiths, with a laugh. In the morning Griffiths drew up the blind. He looked pale and tired after his night s watch, but was full of spirits. Now, I m going to wash you, he said to Philip cheerfully. I can wash myself, said boys brazil football shorts Philip, ashamed. Nonsense. If you were in the small ward a nurse would wash you, and I can do it just as well as a nurse. Philip, too weak and wretched to resist, allowed Griffiths to wash his hands and face, his feet, his chest and back. 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He thought of Hayward and his eager admiration for him when bvb dortmund socks first they met, and how disillusion had come and then indifference, till nothing held them together but habit and old memories. It was one of the queer things of life that you saw a person every day for months and were so intimate with him that you could not imagine existence without him then separation came, and everything went on in the same way, and the companion who had seemed essential proved unnecessary. Your life proceeded and you did not even miss him. Philip thought of those early days in Heidelberg when Hayward, capable of great things, had been full of enthusiasm for the future, and how, little by little, achieving nothing, he had resigned himself to failure. Now he was dead. His death had been as futile as his life. He died ingloriously, of a stupid disease, failing once more, even at the end, to accomplish anything. It was just the same now as if he had never lived. Philip asked himself desperately what was the use of living at all. It all seemed inane. It was the same with Cronshaw it was quite unimportant that he had lived he was dead and forgotten, his book of poems sold in remainder by second hand booksellers his life seemed to have served nothing except to give a pushing journalist occasion to write an article in a review. And Philip cried out in his soul What is the use of it The effort was so incommensurate with the result. The bright hopes of youth had to be paid for at such a bitter price of disillusionment. Pain and disease and unhappiness weighed down the scale so heavily. What did it all mean He thought of his own life, the high hopes with which he had entered upon it, the limitations which his body forced upon him, his friendlessness, and the lack of affection which had surrounded his.